| weird al yanovic - why does this always happen to me:
 I was watching my TV one night when they broke in with a special report
 About dsome devistating earthquake in Peru
 There were thirty thousand crushed to death, even more were buried alive
 On the Richter scale it measured 8.2
 
 And I said, "God, please answer me one question?"
 "Why'd they have to interrupt 'The Simpsons' just for this?"
 What a drag, 'cause I was taping it and everything
 And now I'll have to wait for the rerun to see the part of the show I missed
 
 Why does this always happen?
 Why does this always happen to me?
 Why does this always happen?
 (Why) Why does this always happen to me?
 
 Ba ba ba ba, ba ba ba ba ba
 Ba ba ba ba, ba ba ba ba ba
 
 I was driving down the highway when all the traffic slowed to a crawl
 There was a twelve-car pile-up, everybody dead
 And I saw brains and guts and vital organs splattered everywhere
 As well as my friend Robert's disembodied head
 
 And I thought - Poor Rob, I just had lunch with him
 Hey, wait a minute, he still owes me money - what a jerk
 Well, there's five bucks that I'm never gonna see again
 Plus now, on top of everything else, it looks like I'm gonna be late to work
 
 Why does this always happen?
 Why does this always happen to me?
 Why does this always happen?
 (Why) Why does this always happen to me?
 
 Ba ba ba ba, ba ba ba ba ba
 Ba ba ba ba, ba ba ba ba ba
 Ba ba ba ba, ba ba
 
 Oh, the other day, my boss said we were running low on toner
 And he told me I should buy another case
 Well, I told him I was busy, but he still just kept on asking
 So, I turned around and stabbed him in the face (right in the face)
 
 Oh, and wouldn't you know it, my knife got stuck
 I guess that's probably bound to happen now and then
 But I'm afraid I may have bent the tip a little
 And I know that blade will never ever be quite as sharp again (quite as sharp again)
 Oh, tell me
 
 Why does this always happen?
 Why does this always happen to me?
 Why does this always happen?
 Why does this always happen to me?
 
 Why does this always happen to me?
 (Why does this always happen to me?)
 Why does this always happen to me?
 (Why does this always happen to me?)
 
 Ba ba ba ba, ba ba ba ba ba ba
 Ba ba ba ba, ba ba ba ba ba ba
 Ba ba ba ba, ba ba ba ba ba ba
 Ba ba ba ba, ba ba ba ba ba
 
 Ba ba ba ba ba, ba ba ba ba
 Ba ba ba ba ba, ba ba ba ba ba
 Ba ba ba ba ba, ba ba ba ba ba ba
 Ba ba ba ba ba, ba ba ba ba ba ba
 
 
 weird al yankovic - ebay
 
 Yeah
 A used ... pink bathrobe
 A rare ... mint snowglobe
 A Smurf ... TV tray
 I bought on eBay
 
 My house ... is filled with this crap
 Shows up in bubble wrap
 Most every day
 What I bought on eBay
 
 Tell me why (I need another pet rock)
 Tell me why (I got that Alf alarm clock)
 Tell me why (I bid on Shatner's old toupee)
 They had it on eBay
 
 I'll buy ... your knick-knack
 Just check ... my feedback
 "A++!" they all say
 They love me on eBay
 
 Gonna buy (a slightly-damaged golf bag)
 Gonna buy (some Beanie Babies, new with tag)
 (From some guy) I've never met in Norway
 Found him on eBay
 
 I am the type who is liable to snipe you
 With two seconds left to go, whoa
 Got Paypal or Visa, what ever'll please ya
 As long as I've got the dough
 
 I'll buy ... your tchotchkes
 Sell me ... your watch, please
 I'll buy (I'll buy, I'll buy, I'll buy ...)
 I'm highest bidder now
 
 (Junk keeps arriving in the mail)
 (From that worldwide garage sale) (Dukes Of Hazard ashtray)
 (Hey! A Dukes Of Hazard ashtray)
 Oh yeah ... (I bought it on eBay)
 
 Wanna buy (a PacMan Fever lunchbox)
 Wanna buy (a case of vintage tube socks)
 Wanna buy (a Kleenex used by Dr. Dre, Dr. Dre)
 (Found it on eBay)
 
 Wanna buy (that Farrah Fawcet poster)
 (Pez dispensers and a toaster)
 (Don't know why ... the kind of stuff you'd throw away)
 (I'll buy on eBay)
 
 What I bought on eBay-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y-y
 
 
 
 
 
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