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PostPosted: Sat Oct 15, 2005 6:50 pm 
Beyond Godly
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Ah, my mum was the same. Except it was because I decided I was sick of having horrible old fasioned short hair like her and wanted to grow it out. Her friend told her I'd give up eventually.

I persisted, and now she's eased up a bit and accepts it more instead of nagging me to get it cut.

She also didn't want me to straighten it. "It's not meant to be straight!" Her view soon changed once she'd seen what it looked like after straightening it.

The point is, mums can be a bit stupid sometimes, but once mine saw that it wasn't all that bad and I didn't turn into a tramp, she liked it! =3 Be determind, k?


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PostPosted: Sat Oct 15, 2005 6:59 pm 
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jellyoflight wrote:
Ah, my mum was the same. Except it was because I decided I was sick of having horrible old fasioned short hair like her and wanted to grow it out. Her friend told her I'd give up eventually.

I persisted, and now she's eased up a bit and accepts it more instead of nagging me to get it cut.

She also didn't want me to straighten it. "It's not meant to be straight!" Her view soon changed once she'd seen what it looked like after straightening it.

The point is, mums can be a bit stupid sometimes, but once mine saw that it wasn't all that bad and I didn't turn into a tramp, she liked it! =3 Be determind, k?


My hair used to be really short, too. It looked awful and people actually had mistaken me for a boy before. Now it's past my shoulders, but I'm still not really happy with it. My mom keeps saying "Oh, you don't have to do what everyone else is", but she doesn't understand that actually barely anyone at school has this cut, and that I'm actually trying to be DIFFERENT. People have also made some rude comments on my hair. My hair is just...bleh. It's not shiny and flouncy and healthy-looking like a lot of people's are. It's just boring and flat and there's nothing special about it.


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PostPosted: Sat Oct 15, 2005 7:24 pm 
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labbiedor wrote:
jellyoflight wrote:
Ah, my mum was the same. Except it was because I decided I was sick of having horrible old fasioned short hair like her and wanted to grow it out. Her friend told her I'd give up eventually.

I persisted, and now she's eased up a bit and accepts it more instead of nagging me to get it cut.

She also didn't want me to straighten it. "It's not meant to be straight!" Her view soon changed once she'd seen what it looked like after straightening it.

The point is, mums can be a bit stupid sometimes, but once mine saw that it wasn't all that bad and I didn't turn into a tramp, she liked it! =3 Be determind, k?


My hair used to be really short, too. It looked awful and people actually had mistaken me for a boy before. Now it's past my shoulders, but I'm still not really happy with it. My mom keeps saying "Oh, you don't have to do what everyone else is", but she doesn't understand that actually barely anyone at school has this cut, and that I'm actually trying to be DIFFERENT. People have also made some rude comments on my hair. My hair is just...bleh. It's not shiny and flouncy and healthy-looking like a lot of people's are. It's just boring and flat and there's nothing special about it.


For that, hair serum is both your best friend and a miracle worker =) It makes your hair nice and soft and shiny and calms it down a bit.


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PostPosted: Sat Oct 15, 2005 7:51 pm 
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Bangel wrote:
Don't forget that she'd be paying for it, and the more extravagent the cut, the more expensive it is.


Not always, my mom got her hair changed completely, went from the middle of her back to almost bald and it cost the same as me, and I got a trim.


Sorry your moms like that.


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PostPosted: Sat Oct 15, 2005 8:44 pm 
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Yes, but that's just the taking off of hair. What I'm guessing Labbie wants is an entirely new style.


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PostPosted: Sat Oct 15, 2005 8:59 pm 
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Bangel wrote:
Yes, but that's just the taking off of hair. What I'm guessing Labbie wants is an entirely new style.


No, she got a completely new style.

Just depends where you get it done.


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PostPosted: Sat Oct 15, 2005 9:13 pm 
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Bangel wrote:
Yes, but that's just the taking off of hair. What I'm guessing Labbie wants is an entirely new style.


Not really, I'm just planning on getting my bangs cut so they're shorter. I grew them out so I could tuck them behind my ears, but I've had my hair the same way for a really long time. I would get it so they sort of hang down on the side of my face. Otherwise, I'm just getting a trim (I'm not getting it layered or anything, just taking about a half-inch from my normal length). But apparently my mom's complaining about them hanging in my eyes or making me breakout, which as long as I keep them off to the side of my face and I take good care of my face, neither of those things should happen.


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PostPosted: Sat Oct 15, 2005 9:15 pm 
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If you have the money to, you should suggest that you pay for it- what you want does sound inexpensive contrary to what I thought before, and if it's something you want, and you're okay if all goes wrong, plus if you pay for it, I can find no real reason she could object. But by what it sounds like, at least she cares more about the effects it could have on you instead of the effects it could have on her wallet.


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PostPosted: Sat Oct 15, 2005 10:18 pm 
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If it makes you feel better (and it probably won't :P), I wasn't allowed to choose my own hairstyle until I was much older than you are now. My mom was still fixing my hair at 13, she wouldn't let me do it myself. I had a pixie-cut plus a perm, which equals me looking like a strawberry blonde poodle. And it was no longer the 80s when I had that cut. >_<

Anyway, sometimes you do simply have to accept what your parents say. At least she's giving you a reason (albeit a rather bad one), instead of just saying no. I would talk to your stylist, and perhaps do it in front of your mother so she can hear if what you want is a good or bad idea. If she still says no, well, she's your mom, and for the time being you're still a minor in her household, and what she says goes. Yes, I believe teenagers should be allowed to make their own decisions and have nearly the same rights as adults, but some parents don't agree with that view, and you'll have to learn to deal with it for the time being. Who knows, perhaps with some mature persuasion she might give in. Just keep your cool, and if it looks like the discussion is going to escalate into a fight, concede defeat and try again another time.


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PostPosted: Sat Oct 15, 2005 10:25 pm 
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Bangel wrote:
If you have the money to, you should suggest that you pay for it- what you want does sound inexpensive contrary to what I thought before, and if it's something you want, and you're okay if all goes wrong, plus if you pay for it, I can find no real reason she could object. But by what it sounds like, at least she cares more about the effects it could have on you instead of the effects it could have on her wallet.


i totally, totally agree. the best way to deal with an overprotective or ridiculously stubborn parent is to make your own money and pay for your own stuff. you're going to have to do that when you get older, anyway, so you might as well learn how to do it now.

i also like to encourage people to open a savings account as early as possible, and don't take any money out of it. by the time you're 18, you should have enough saved up for a deposit on an apartment and you can move out and do whatever the hell you want. that's what i did. six years later i haven't looked back, and my parents and i actually have a much better relationship now that they can't boss me around.


in the meantime, the suggestion of talking it over with your mom and the stylist is a fantastic one. sometimes moms need outside stimulation to realize that they're being silly.


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PostPosted: Sat Oct 15, 2005 11:11 pm 
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VeraX wrote:
Bangel wrote:
Yes, but that's just the taking off of hair. What I'm guessing Labbie wants is an entirely new style.


No, she got a completely new style.

Just depends where you get it done.


My stylist is the same way. There is a standard price for a haircut, whether you are getting 1/2 inch cut off all the way around or a wild new "do."


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PostPosted: Sun Oct 16, 2005 2:12 am 
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Bleh, the things parents can do ...

I grew up kind of the same as Mylene. I had to have my hair the way my mother wanted it. When I was little it was a true short pixie which was cut by a professional, but when I got a little older, around 10, there was no hairdresser. She cut it herself into this really weird half bob thing - cut just above the ears and had to have bangs. Except she couldn't cut a straight line (neither can I), so she'd keep trying to even it out and I usually ended up with these bizarre 1 or 2 inch long bangs that went almost to my ears (she couldn't get the sides to line up either).

I was never allowed to have my hair long, I got the "it will be in your face, your hair's too oily, long bangs will give you acne on your forehead" kind of logic. Some people I guess really believe that!

Needless to say, I was truly a glamour don't.

Going to the hairdresser was something that didn't happen until high school for me - and then only for proms and a formal I went to. Otherwise, it was that awful almost-bowl cut.

Now a friend of ours has a teenage daughter and a younger son (about 10). Both are pretty much allowed to do whatever they want to their hair. The daughter dyes her hair, but usually a blond shade and highlights it herself (savvy girl!). She does go to a salon for haircuts, but she babysits and does other odd jobs to pay for it herself. The son has had a buzz cut, mohawk, dyed it purple, green, blue, all different colors.

I'd probably do the same thing - let my son/daughter do what they like with their hair. It'll grow back, and if they do something dire with hair dye, well, it can be cut until the dye's gone!

There are times when No is the right answer and there's usually a very good reason for it. Like, I wouldn't let my child get pierced (except ears - not cartilage, no plugs or anything) or tattooed until they were older. Clothing can be something where the parent has to draw a line depending. But getting a new hairstyle? I'd say go for it.


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PostPosted: Sun Oct 16, 2005 2:43 am 
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Talk to the stylist in front of your mother as others have suggested. Say that your mother has some concerns about a hair cut you want, and you'd like to see what the hair dresser has to say. If you want highlights, you can buy boxed ones for cheaper than professional jobs, but I don't know how well they turn out.

Or just put bleach in her coffee. :evil:


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PostPosted: Sun Oct 16, 2005 4:21 am 
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everconfused wrote:
She cut it herself into this really weird half bob thing - cut just above the ears and had to have bangs. Except she couldn't cut a straight line (neither can I), so she'd keep trying to even it out and I usually ended up with these bizarre 1 or 2 inch long bangs that went almost to my ears (she couldn't get the sides to line up either).


Oh my God, EC, are we sisters? Because you are describing my mother--it has to be the same woman. There couldn't possibly be two people in the world that would do that to their child. Oh, I remember a time when I don't even think I had 1 inch bangs. My mom kept trying to even them out. And, at the time, I had this horrible cowlick. So, the 1/2 inch of fringe on the one side of my head stuck completely up, while the 2 inches of bangs on the other side of my head laid flat. I was 13 years old and so self conscious of my glasses already. And now I was a total freak of nature, thanks to my mom.

I cried and cried and cried. And, my dad stepped in and never let her cut my hair again. Some people are just not meant to hold scissors in their hands.


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PostPosted: Sun Oct 16, 2005 12:14 pm 
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Morningstar wrote:
everconfused wrote:
She cut it herself into this really weird half bob thing - cut just above the ears and had to have bangs. Except she couldn't cut a straight line (neither can I), so she'd keep trying to even it out and I usually ended up with these bizarre 1 or 2 inch long bangs that went almost to my ears (she couldn't get the sides to line up either).


Oh my God, EC, are we sisters? Because you are describing my mother--it has to be the same woman. There couldn't possibly be two people in the world that would do that to their child. Oh, I remember a time when I don't even think I had 1 inch bangs. My mom kept trying to even them out. And, at the time, I had this horrible cowlick. So, the 1/2 inch of fringe on the one side of my head stuck completely up, while the 2 inches of bangs on the other side of my head laid flat. I was 13 years old and so self conscious of my glasses already. And now I was a total freak of nature, thanks to my mom.

I cried and cried and cried. And, my dad stepped in and never let her cut my hair again. Some people are just not meant to hold scissors in their hands.

I can top that.

My mum tried to cut my hair once.

After she'd had 3 glasses of champagne.

Not the best idea.


Gone, forever.


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