Pudding wrote:
Asthaloth wrote:
I still feel that Australia is the testing ground for Biological weaponry, you watch, next week it will be revealed they share a gestalt conciousness called the Hive mind and that they have summoned their hive fleet to devour earth.
plastic ninja wrote:
goody goody! but i think hes gone mad. but on that topic, ill bet kyms in on it! kym is why we have platapus!
The whole thing took place in Laos, so any conspiracy theories about Kym and/or the Australian government will have to get slightly more complicated.
Please make them more complicated.
Your wish is my command, since I'm currently staying up late to study and desperately need a break. Besides, I'm good at complicated. Simple, on the other hand, is a whole separate matter...
Australia obviously has been experimenting with animals as potential weapons for centuries. First of all, just look at all the marsupials roaming around -- America gets the lowly opossum, but Australia gets kangaroos
and koalas. They may look cute, but kangaroos can kick like van Damme, and have you seen a
koala's claws? And come on, four out of the five
deadliest snakes in the world? You might think you should just get off the land and take haven in the water, but Australia's got that covered, too, between the crocodiles and the deadly
stingers. So let's get back to dry land, shall we, and talk about that most famous Australian marsupial, Taz. Rumours abound about the
cancer plaguing the devils, but the reality is much more sinister.
Everyone knows that Tasmania is
the hub of the Main Australian Center for Animal Weaponry and Experimentation (MACAW). Top-secret experiments to grow rodents of unusual size went disastrously awry when a goanna sneaked into the lab. The problem might have been contained, but unfortunately, it was a hatching female. Reports of
goannas capable of eating small children (much like that other Australian experimental species, the
dingo) began to appear in tabloids, and so MACAW, in an effort to eradicate the lizards, engineered a tumor virus. Unfortunately, the brains of the lizards had grown as well as their body, and they were somehow able to not only develop their own species' resistance to the virus, but also to mutate it to affect that icon of Tasmanian tourism, Taz.
Not content with this meager revenge, the lizards decided to start a land war in Asia by sneaking into an Australian aid envoy to Laos. Fearing that MACAW's existence would finally be revealed to the world, Australia sent in a crack team of MACAW enforcers to secretly destroy the lizards in Laos. Unfortunately, Laos had turned out to be a most suitable habitat for the lizards, and they had quickly reproduced and organized into a primitive society. The Australian team woefully underestimated the lizards, and Mr. Adcock's injuries were a direct result. The conspiracy continues, as legal expert Kym tries to cover up the entire incident by discrediting Adcock and his family. Meanwhile, Australian zoologists are seeding the rumour that the lizard is related to the Asian Komodo dragon in an attempt to cover up its similarity to the goanna.