Hello, my name is Dylan and I'm asking for your vote on this, Election Day.
I feel I would make an excellent PPT President as I am quite experienced at judging, coordinating, and organizing things, as well as doing the very little the job seems to entail. Moreover I am online quite frequently, so I will have a lot of time to do it in.
My platform has been described as about two feet tall and made of mahogany. If elected I would:
● Repeal the law of gravity.
● Legalize pot. And pan. And spatula. And some other kitchen utensils.
● Abolish pumping oil out of the ground, as that oil is there to keep the earth moving smoothly on its axis and if you withdraw the oil the whole thing will grind to a halt.
● Make bubble gum our official currency, so that it could be inflated or deflated as needed
● Impose an import quota on freezing winters and boiling hot summers. It's time to get back to the four basic seasons: salt, pepper, mustard, and vinegar.
● Provide higher education by building taller schools.
And other important things.
I would like to thank
Roxas,
Ric (even though you unnominated me, you nominated me before that),
Tom,
thelilbear,
Kuge, and
Miyu for nominating me for the job.
Thank you for your time, and please
Vote: Dyl!