College Quotes 2... Subject: Professors

Onorr · **Posted:** Mon Jul 12, 2004 12:04 pm

College students aren't the only ones who say silly things.

(Note: I did have to edit a one quote due to language, but it really should not have any effect on its hilarity. And it may be awhile before I can get some more posted; but I do have more!

)

Here we go!
*****************************
"I would've had a heartastroke!"
-Professor Page

"There is no music in the band room!"
-Dr. Thomas, while telling a student to put away his headphones

"We have our test next class. If you are going to cheat...sit next to somebody smart."
-Professor Cooper

Don't shoot grannies! It's bad! Sometimes."
-Professor Ealick, during a discussion on morals

"If you don't have the Internet... then just e-mail me or something and we'll figure it out."
-Professor Jackson

"Dying is not good for your survival."
-Professor Schmidt, during biology

Professor Dunn: Kelli, when was the war of 1812?
Kelli: I'm sorry. I wasn't paying any attention.
Professor Dunn: WHEN WAS THE WAR OF 1812?
Kelli: I have already told you that I was not paying any attention!
Professor Dunn: KELLI! When was the War of 1812?
Kelli: I DO NOT KNOW WHEN THE WAR OF 1812 WAS!!!........oh!

"Oh, hold on kids, I think we just lost another one! MAN I'm getting boring!"
-Dr. Shulman, spotting a student falling asleep in class

"The buffalos were reproducing like, like buffalos."
-Professor Curtis, during an American History lecture

"If you're not going to pay attention to me, at least curb your flatulence."
-Professor Pierce, during math class

Dr. Richardson: What did Dorthea Dix have to do with the Civil War?
Some idiot in the class: Wasn't she a fighter pilot?

"Make sure that you're test is legible for my wife to read."
-Professor Heckman, on a written final

_jaye_ · **Posted:** Mon Jul 12, 2004 1:53 pm

I love professors'/teachers' jokes

:D

Onorr wrote:

Professor Dunn: Kelli, when was the war of 1812?
Kelli: I'm sorry. I wasn't paying any attention.
Professor Dunn: WHEN WAS THE WAR OF 1812?
Kelli: I have already told you that I was not paying any attention!
Professor Dunn: KELLI! When was the War of 1812?
Kelli: I DO NOT KNOW WHEN THE WAR OF 1812 WAS!!!........oh!

This is one of my favs

Twinkle · **Posted:** Mon Jul 12, 2004 10:07 pm

Hehe, they made me chuckle. I love these! :lol:

Kristina · **Posted:** Tue Jul 13, 2004 1:33 am

Onorr wrote:

Professor Dunn: Kelli, when was the war of 1812?
Kelli: I'm sorry. I wasn't paying any attention.
Professor Dunn: WHEN WAS THE WAR OF 1812?
Kelli: I have already told you that I was not paying any attention!
Professor Dunn: KELLI! When was the War of 1812?
Kelli: I DO NOT KNOW WHEN THE WAR OF 1812 WAS!!!........oh!

I still dunno when that war was. O_o

It's a joke, people!

Charisma · **Posted:** Tue Jul 13, 2004 5:38 am

Onorr wrote:

"There is no music in the band room!"
-Dr. Thomas, while telling a student to put away his headphones

"If you don't have the Internet... then just e-mail me or something and we'll figure it out."
-Professor Jackson

"Dying is not good for your survival."
-Professor Schmidt, during biology

"Oh, hold on kids, I think we just lost another one! MAN I'm getting boring!"
-Dr. Shulman, spotting a student falling asleep in class

"The buffalos were reproducing like, like buffalos."
-Professor Curtis, during an American History lecture

"Make sure that you're test is legible for my wife to read."
-Professor Heckman, on a written final

Hehehe those are good :lol:

. I enjoyed some of the college student ones

. My friends never say anything funny, they stink

autechre · **Posted:** Thu Jul 15, 2004 11:32 am

the sad thing is, i also have heard some classics like that in class, pity i didn't have a tape recorder..

but the war of 1812 one is the best

alina · **Posts:** 214 **Joined:** Tue Jun 01, 2004 2:56 am

Quote:

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Onorr wrote:

Professor Dunn: Kelli, when was the war of 1812?
Kelli: I'm sorry. I wasn't paying any attention.
Professor Dunn: WHEN WAS THE WAR OF 1812?
Kelli: I have already told you that I was not paying any attention!
Professor Dunn: KELLI! When was the War of 1812?
Kelli: I DO NOT KNOW WHEN THE WAR OF 1812 WAS!!!........oh!

I still dunno when that war was. O_o

its called the war of 1812

lol its in 1812 don't worry i was like that too at first

Veritas · **Posted:** Thu Jul 15, 2004 5:08 pm

haha, I liked the war of 1812 one the best. It took me a while to figure it out!

Those are good, I've been in class during some of those moments! haha.

robot · **Posted:** Thu Jul 15, 2004 5:10 pm

Those are great. I wish I'd kept track of some of the things my professors said last year. Especially my Intro. to Law professor. She was a moron. I don't know how she got that job in the first place. Yet alone how she became a lawyer. >.< The idea of her representing another person is quite scary.

Miss Kass · **Posted:** Sat Jul 24, 2004 12:02 am

Quote:

"Dying is not good for your survival."
-Professor Schmidt, during biology

That's my favorite. :roflol:

I never would have guessed..

Blake · **Posted:** Sat Jul 24, 2004 1:13 am

I would never say....When is the war of 1812 people??

its a joke,

Neko · **Posted:** Sun Jul 25, 2004 1:53 am

Professor Dunn: Kelli, when was the war of 1812?
Kelli: I'm sorry. I wasn't paying any attention.
Professor Dunn: WHEN WAS THE WAR OF 1812?
Kelli: I have already told you that I was not paying any attention!
Professor Dunn: KELLI! When was the War of 1812?
Kelli: I DO NOT KNOW WHEN THE WAR OF 1812 WAS!!!........oh!

lol. This one is my fave, but I don't even know when that war of 1812 was either. ^.^;; *sweatdrop* Heh heh...

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College Quotes 2... Subject: Professors

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