Ok, so this Scotsman arrives in America. Sick of being mocked by Americans, he heads up to Canada. In Canada, he feels much more welcome and makes good friends with a few locals at the pub.
On his final day, he turns to his new mates and says
"Lets go Moose hunting!" (with a thick Scottish accent naturally)
The Canadians figure "what the hey, it's his final request before heading back to Scotland", so they head out to the woods.
They sit for hours until finally, a great hulking Moose walks into the clearing. One of the Canadians hands his rifle to the Scotsman and says
"You wanted to come hunting, so you can have it..."
The Scotsman, white with terror turns to the Canadian and in a hushed voice says...
"Jeez laddy, if that's yer Moose, I'd hate to see yer Rats..."
Yay for bad jokes!
Coincidently, I'm 1/2 scottish. Though I don't have a Scottish accent
Stuck with the Kiwi accent