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How to annoy people And amuse yourself

Sun Jun 04, 2006 4:12 pm

Sing the Batman theme incessantly.

Specify that your drive-through order is "to go".

Learn Morse code, and have conversations with friends in public consisting entirely of "Beeeep Bip Bip..."

If you have a glass eye, tap on it occasionally with your pen while talking to others.

Amuse yourself for endless hours by hooking a camcorder to your TV and then pointing it at the screen.

Speak only in a "robot" voice.

Push all the flat Lego pieces together tightly.

Start each meal by conspicuously licking all your food, and announcing its your property.

Leave the copy machine set to reduce 200%, extra dark, 17 inch paper, 99 copies.

Stomp on little plastic ketchup packets.

Leave your turn signal on for fifty miles.

Name your dog "Dog".

Insist on keeping your car windshield wipers running in all weather conditions "to keep them tuned up".

Reply to everything someone says with "That's what YOU think!"

Declare your apartment an independent nation, and sue your neighbors upstairs for "violating your airspace".

Forget the punch line to a long joke, but assure the listener it was a "real hoot".

Follow a few paces behind someone, spraying everything they touch with a can of Lysol.

Practice making fax and modem noises.

Highlight irrelevant information in scientific papers and copy them to your boss.

Make beeping noises when a large person backs up.

Invent nonsense computer jargon in conversations, and see if people play along to avoid looking ignorant.

Erect an elaborate network of ropes in your backyard, and tell the neighbors you are a "spider person".

Finish all your sentences with the words "in accordance with prophesy."

Wear a special hip holster for your remote control.

Signal that a conversation is over by clamping your hands over your ears.

Disassemble your pen and "accidentally" flip the ink cartridge across the room.

Give a play-by-play account of a person's every action in a nasal Howard Cossell voice.

To really annoy people, stand on a street corner, pointing a hair drier at passing traffic, and watch it slow down.

Holler random numbers while someone is counting.

Take a sock puppet to dinner with you. When the waiter comes to ask you what you want, consult the sock. When the check comes argue with the sock loud enough so everyone can hear you about who will pay the bill, throw him down and say "Fine you pay!" then leave.

Re: How to annoy people And amuse yourself

Mon Jun 05, 2006 10:38 pm

Twitchy wrote:If you have a glass eye, tap on it occasionally with your pen while talking to others.
I'll keep that in mind, if I ever get a glass eye.

FAV!~ Finish all your sentences with the words "in accordance with prophesy."
I'm SO gonna do that! <3

The only one I remember is:
Bring a female friend along with you to a drive-through. Make sure she takes her order in a seductive voice. Quickly change seats and hid her before you drive up to the cashier. Smile and wink at the staff members who were expecting that "sexy babe." ;)

Tue Jun 13, 2006 3:21 am

Push all the flat Lego pieces together tightly.

I've done that haha! And for the stomping on ketchup packets, we always used to hide them behind people's car tires lol.

Tue Jun 13, 2006 4:50 am

Sadly, I know a girl who does most of these things in the most annoying way possible :o

Tue Jun 13, 2006 1:54 pm

Heh, i worked in a McDonald's, and we always laughed when people asked for their order "to go" in drive thru. Most times they were just being absentminded

Wed Jun 14, 2006 1:31 am

Twitch wrote:Holler random numbers while someone is counting.


You have no idea how many times i've done this.
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